It’s no secret that we hate Sony. Naturally, when a government agency contracted us to identify the root cause of 21st century disasters, we pinned the blame directly on the 2020 release of the PlayStation 5. Given that [REDACTED] paid us upfront, we were content to take the money and leave it at that. Still, the question kept nagging us: what if the PS5 had launched during the golden age of video games? To find out, we had no choice but to purchase enough translucent plastic to beach a whale, then fashion it into a time machine. After emerging from this semi-opaque vessel in the year 1997, we immediately set our experiment in motion - launching our own PlayStation 5, complete with translucent side panels. As it turns out, a PlayStation 5 is a confusing sell to an audience that's never encountered a PlayStation 2, 3, or 4. Once we'd failed to meet our sky-high 1997 profit targets, we had no choice but to short $ENRN and return to the present day - but not before stealing every see-through PS5 side panel we could get our hands on.